The Customer is always right ?
Appointment With Stupidity
Car Dealership | Sandy, UT, USA
Me: “Service Center, how may I help you?”
Customer: “I need to make an appointment to get my oil changed.”
Me: “Oh alright. Well, just so you know, you can come in whenever you are available during the week.”
Customer: “So, Monday through Friday?”
Me: “Yep!”
Customer: “So, wait…we don’t need an appointment?”
Me: “Nope, just come right in!”
Customer: “So, what your saying is we don’t need an appointment?”
Me: “Yes, ma’am.”
Customer: “I dunno about that.”
Me: “About what?”
Customer: “Not having an appointment.”
Me: “Well, do you want me to put you down for an appointment?”
Customer: “You just said I didn’t need one!”
Me: “Well, so you’re not so confused, I can put you in whatever slot you want.”
Customer: “No, I’ll just go somewhere else!”
Not Thinking Outside The Box
Tech Support | Atlanta, GA, USA
Caller: “I have a wireless printer, and it won’t install. It says print out of the box. What do I need to do?”
Me: “Have you installed the printer onto you network?”
Caller: “Well, it says print right out of the box so I thought that meant leave it in the box.”
Light Food For Light Thinkers
Restaurant | Lancaster, OH, USA
(My table has just ordered our unlimited soup and salad.)
Me: “Ok, I’ll go ahead a put this in for you and be right back with your salad and bread.”
Customer: “So where is y’alls salad bar?”
Me: “Pardon me?”
Customer: *speaking slowly* “The sal-ad ba-ar. Where is it?”
Me: “Um, we don’t have a salad bar sir, I bring it to your table.”
Customer: “You bring the salad bar to the table?.”
Me: “No sir, I bring out a bowl of salad for everyone at the table to share.”
Customer: “So, it’s not endless?”
Me: “Yes, it still is endless, I bring out as much salad as you want.”
Customer: “How you gonna know how much I want?”
Me: “I bring out as many bowls as you tell be to bring.”
Customer: “Well how am I supposed to know how many to tell you when I don’t even know how much is in one?”
Me: “After I bring out the first bowl, you can tell me if you’d like some more.”
Customer: “But I want all my salad now!”
Me: “We don’t bring out all the salad at once so you get the freshest product possible.”
Customer: “But I want it now.”
Me: “Well as soon as I go back to the kitchen, I can bring it out for you.”
Customer: “But I want it now!”
Me: “So I’ll go and get it for you.”
(As I finally walk away, I hear him say to this to his wife, “So, where’s my salad?”)
All Quiet On The Modern Front
Tech Support | Dallas, TX, USA
Me: “Thank you for calling tech support, how may I help you?”
Caller: “My talk commands aren’t working on my computer.”
Me: “Your speech commands? Well, tell me what’s the problem.”
Caller: “I keep telling my computer to turn on, but it won’t.”
Me: “I’m sorry, but the speech commands only work if the computer is already on.”
Caller: “Then what’s the point of them?”
Me: “They make things easier once the computer is on.”
Caller: “How do I get my computer on if it won’t listen?!”
Me: “Just turn it on like normal.”
Caller: “I don’t want to! That’s why I enabled the godd**n speech commands!” *click*